Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Dealing with Your Narcissistic Siblings' Cruel Projections

People project all of the time. It is very rare that a person is able to recognize his projection and own it. This is part of the path toward self awareness and higher consciousness.

Narcissists project their noxious psychological detritus on to others, especially family members. It is particularly  miserable if you have narcissistic siblings who are taking cruel swings at you all of the time. You may have spent your childhood at the mercy of an older narcissistic brother or sister. Most often parents of these children are dismissive of these cruel maneuvers. In fact if these are golden children they have free rein to activate their superiority at the expense of their siblings The parents have chosen these special kids that will provide them with narcissistic supplies. They will forever have bragging rights that their kid(s) is brighter, more attractive, more sociable, more studious than all others. These parents teach the budding narcissist that they do not have to regard others with respect, even their brothers and sisters. Those on the receiving end of these verbal assaults suffer horribly under the siege of the narcissist. One of the best ways of handling this is through your knowledge of the true nature of the narcissist, recognizing that this is a false grandiose self that your brother or sister has a severe personality disorder that will not change. Put you attention on to your growth and the use of your many gifts. Learn to separate out the narcissist's projections from yourself by detaching emotionally from these individuals. If this doesn't work for you, then you can make the decision to sever the relationship with the narcissistic brother and/or sister.  Sometimes this is necessary. When a sibling has crossed the line of decency and respect for you too many times, seriously consider ending what was never a true relationship. Narcissists are incapable of caring about anyone but themselves. They are ruthless, harsh, and you will never find them to be kind or understanding.
As you grow up and recognize that you have been treated dismissively and abusively, you begin to realize that this pattern is highly pathological. At some point you will draw the line and know that you no longer must or should tolerate this dreadful treatment you have suffered for many years by the narcissistic sibling.   I have known of many individuals who have made this break and who now are leading a life that they are steering in directions of their own choosing. We are here to use our creative gifts and  to reciprocally love other human beings. When you finally free, you will thank yourself that you took a different pathway. Your horizons are unlimited.  To learn about every facet of the narcissistic personality, visit my website: thenarcissistinyourlife.com 
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
Email: lmlphd@thenarcissistinyourlife.com

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