Friday, September 6, 2013

Self Care---Key to Healing from the Narcissist

Whether you are the son or daughter of a narcissistic mother or father, the spouse of a narcissist or the  sibling of a narcissist you have been through a painful ordeal that caused you psychological and emotional pain.  You cannot erase this reality but you can heal and move forward with your life. You are entitled to feel secure, independent, hopeful, inspired, calm and in charge. As you unloosen the mental and psychological chains that have bound you--step out and appreciate your true true self, the person you were always meant to be.

Self Care is the beginning of healing after the narcissist.

1. Take time each day to be with yourself in solitude in the way that you define it. Set this time aside for yourself so that you will not be interrupted. Learn to quiet your mind for a few minutes at a time consistently through meditation, gentle yoga poses, listening to calming music, prayer and other activities that bring you inner peace. 

2. Make an effort to get the sleep that you need. You will be rewarded with a clear mind and an increase in your physical and mental stamina. 

3. Learn to say "No" to those who would take advantage of you--narcissists in particular. You have already had this painful experience. Your days of being manipulated and exploited are over.

4. Become less concerned about what others think of you when you activate your independent thinking. You are free now to express your own opinions.

5. Eat healthy foods that nourish all of your body systems including that part of the nervous system that keeps us feeling calm.

6. Express your creativity in ways that appeal to you---writing, painting, dancing, singing, cooking, gardening, designing, etc.

7. Form a support system of a few individuals whom you can count on anytime. This can take time. Be receptive to those who cross your path whom you think are possible candidates.

8. Take your sense of humor out of cold storage (if that is where it has been while you were under the control of the narcissist) and let her rip---If you are silly, go for it. If you are inclined toward dry wit, let's hear it. Each person has a unique sense of humor which is delightful. Humor saves us. This life is not easy and we must have humor as our constant companion.

9. Pay close attention to the messages of your intuition. Intuition is a gift we have as human beings. The more often it is used, the greater its power to guide us through life.

10. Practice receiving the affection and love that others offer to you. Embrace it and feel the warmth.

Visit my
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life


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