Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Don't Give Yourself Away to a Narcissistic Spouse

Your time, energy, talents, gifts, intelligence, psychological and physical stamina, respect for your feelings belong to you. They are your birthright. It doesn't matter who your parents are or were, what level of social status or schooling you have achieved-----none of this counts. You deserve to be treated like a unique individual. Narcissists possess others as obedient objects. Narcissists are inhumane. They will work you down to your last breath, then resuscitate you---not because they care or love you, but to get the most from you before you collapse again. Narcissists are users and abusers. They are hypocrites beyond measure. In scripture the religious hypocrite is referred to as a "whitened sepulchre." That is a clear definition of many narcissistic personalities who have molded and polished their image to burnished gold. Inside there is the psychological decay and emptiness that remains with them.

Sociopaths can play the part of nice guy or gal but they are not obsessively concerned with image. They are after something. They have a plot in mind to exploit you to the max, and get away to go on to their next victim. They can't be bothered with image. Some spouses stay with sociopaths despite the fact that they literally destroy their lives.

Learn to appreciate that your personality and all of gifts of creativity and compassion that you bring to bear and that you demonstrate every day have meaning and are invaluable. You are separate from the narcissist. Learn to identify these individuals quickly and clearly through the accumulation of knowledge about the psychopathology and the fine uses of your intuition. Make a conscious decision to remove the narcissists from your life. If you cannot do it with physical distance, achieve it with developing emotional detachment and the clear recognition of who they really are---scavengers, vipers, vultures--among the lowest of the low. Work at becoming self entitled ---recognizing that you deserve to lead a life of inner peace and psychological and emotional freedom. Visit my website: www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com  

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
Buy the book: amazon.com and amazon kindle edition
Email: lmlphd@thenarcissistinyourlife.com

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