Narcissists lie constantly; it is the air they breathe. They are believable with their lies. They enjoy the power they have over you when they not telling the truth. Lying is a way to control you, to keep you guessing, to throw you off guard. Narcissists have been telling lies all of their lives. A lie is a shortcut to get what they want whether it is an attractive man or woman, a valuable business connection, a way of taking custody of a child away from the custodial parent. There are so many life stories of narcissists lied their way through an entire divorce, pretending that they were the victims. There are women who have been left without the children they raised from birth because their narcissistic husbands plotted to wrest them away from them. He cleverly planted lies in the minds of his ex-spouse's family and friends (many believed him). Mediators and even judges are known to make mistakes in awarding full custody to the narcissistic parent who has hired an army of legal experts to win. This narcissist doesn't really have deep love for his children---they are narcissistic supplies---part of his perfect image as a great father.
If you suspect through you keen observations and study of the narcissistic personality that your spouse is a narcissist act to protect yourself and your children as soon as possible. Do not wait for the narcissist to change--this is not going to happen. Strengthen yourself and your resolve. Create a plan for severing your marital relationship through divorce. This is a big step but it is better to move early than to wait until you are so entangled with the narcissist that it becomes even more difficult to free yourself and renew your life and give your children an opportunity to lead solid, happy, creative and hopeful lives. To learn about the narcissistic personality disorder in-depth, visit my website:thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
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