Sunday, October 21, 2012

Narcissist Style Has Taken Over

The narcissistic style is obsessive self involvement sprinkled with lack of empathy, compassion and doses of  of materialism and the need for external perfection. There are countless individuals who lead their lives with consideration for others and who will stop and help people they don't know. They provide comfort to their friends and are present and loving to their families and people whom they have never met before.

I am talking about what has happened to many individuals in the course of a decade or so. The narcissistic style is being highly rewarded by corporations, amid many social circles, in the media and entertainment.
Externals of face, body, figure, clothing, connections, glamour and youth are rewarded over kindness, consideration of others, thoughtfulness, empathy and deep awareness. It has become a Darwinian world. Many people are out strictly for themselves and brag about it with their constant self references of success, monetary gain and, with regard to parents, the perfection  and brilliance of their children.

Many individuals need to wake up and realize that some people lead very difficult if not impossible lives. They had it very rough as children. They were dismissed, abused, neglected, beaten, psychologically deprived, physically ill and poverty stricken. Never assume when you meet someone that they have not had a very painful background and that every moment of their life now is trying. I am sickened by the lack of sensitivity and awareness of those who have taken up the narcissistic style as a way of life. Learn to tune in to the other person before you start bragging about yourself and all of your achievements and monetary worth.  Keep still and listen and take the other person in. Then you will know what to say about yourself and when to keep quiet.

There are extraordinary human beings who are so empathic they restore your belief in the goodness of people. We need more of them. If you are one of these, appreciate yourself. Let your light shine. Visit my

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life

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