High level narcissists, those standout individuals who have success in all of their business and social endeavors, are plentiful today and growing in numbers. Many go through a series of marriages, like a television soap opera. I have spoken with a number of ex-spouses of narcissists who were obsessed with the heady lifestyle that accompanies these unions. High level narcissists with their adoring circle of admirers creates a stir wherever they land. Those who marry narcissists, regardless of their professional accomplishments, are required to play the supportive role to the star of the company. Often golden couples who shine in public, in private the scenes between the partners turn very ugly. Narcissists are perfectionists and manipulators. They think nothing of spewing their narcissistic rage, accusations and criticisms when the partner is not mirroring them perfectly. Although they live in material privilege, these spouses are treated like inanimate possessions and have no value to the narcissist as human beings. The narcissist is incapable of authentic relationships. For him or her, spouses are disposable. When the spouse of a narcissist is perceived as being beyond her prime, or some great beauty has taken his fancy, the marriage is over---this despite all of the years she has been the recipient of verbal abuse, humiliations-–this in spite the children they share. All that matters is what the narcissist wants and most have now.
Even though many spouses have grown to despise their narcissistic spouses, they are addicted to the flashy lifestyle, the ability to travel to any corner of the world, to satisfy their needs to purchase whatever they desire, to be noticed as the chosen partner of the golden couple.
Narcissists can make the divorce process unbearable for the soon to be ex-spouse. They play very dirty, lying and manipulating their way through the process. Once the papers are signed, most narcissists are off to their new life with another partner with whom they have been previously involved. The abandoned spouse is often left with limited financial resources and deep emotional and psychological pain. Some ex-spouses put their lives back together after a long journey of self recovery. They recognize that they had been mistaken. They thought they had married someone whom they loved and would reciprocate. Instead they became deluded and lost in the sparkling delusion of the narcissistic lifestyle. To protect yourself from these fateful relationships and to become highly knowledgeable about every facet of the narcissistic personality, visit my website: www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life.
Buy the Book: amazon.com and amazon kindle edition