Narcissistic siblings do not change. As little children they already have become self entitled to the hilt. I remember visiting one of these dysfunctional families. It was startling. Soon after I arrived the parents' three year old was hitting her little brother mercilessly and landing punches. The parents said nothing to her. They finally "woke up" for a moment and in a frail voice the mother said: "Dear, that's not very nice." That's it.
I remember that the tiny she- devil demanded ice cream on the spot. She was a broken record. I was not able to converse with the parents because her voice rose when she didn't get what she wanted. She threw herself all over the furniture and finally started a frenzied dance on the coffee table. Mother ran to the kitchen and quickly appeared with a heaping bowl of ice cream. But that was not enough. She had to have some cherries on top. Mother ran back and got them. I was dumbfounded and almost screamed myself. I shortened my visit since it was impossible to communicate with these parents of a budding narcissist.
I got reports from other relatives and friends of the family that Angelica had gotten worse. Her brother was the constant target of physical and emotional abuse. The parents still did not intervene. It was as if they were afraid of the tyrant in their midst. Her demands and cruelties continued and became more serious. The little brother often hid in his room to avoid Angelica the Hun. Surprising that she didn't have a collection of ancient swords in her bedroom. I never returned to this house nor did I renew my acquaintance with this family. Many years later I was invited to daughter's wedding. Angelica was Bridezilla on steroids. Her maids of honor were criticized and psychologically beaten down and told exactly what they could do and not do. They were intimidated by the bride.This full grown narcissist was now running the entire family. Her brother was still traumatized from the years of abuse by her and obliviousness by the parents.
He fortunately moved away, married and had very little contact with the eternal Bridezilla.
If you have a narcissistic sibling, these life stories are no mystery to you. The question is: How much more are you going to take? Narcissists don't change. They grow older and crueler. Learn to give priority to your own life, to your talents, your dreams, your personal relationships, your creativity. Research the true nature of the narcissistic personality. Visit my website:thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life